Game Of Thrones Recap: “Hardhome”

Well, things escalated quickly, didn’t they?

Makes sense that they would, since after this episode, there’s only two left in Season 5 of Game of Thrones. In a season that had the slowest build up that I can remember, “Hardhome” delivered with Arya finally getting purpose, Sansa no longer in the dark about her family, Tyrion and Dany conversing, and of course, the epic battle between Jon Snow and his new Wildling buddies and the white walkers. We also briefly checked in with Cersei, who was having a VERY bad hair day. Lots to talk about.

Arya with a mission? And a purpose? What?

I’ve said in my previous Game of Thrones recap that the slowest of the slow story lines this season is Arya’s “adventures” in Braavos. Not much has been going on there. But finally, this episode we got to see Arya step up her training with Jaqen H’ghar, AKA Mr. Cryptic. With all the religious chaos occurring in King’s Landing, I’m very anxious about Arya joining another group that worships a super judgmental God. Anyway, so she’s taken on a new identity and is tasked with the mission of killing a bookie. This won’t end bad. Oh no, not at all. But at least she got a makeover!

Sansa finally gets a glimmer of hope

Thank the weird judgmental gods for finally giving Sansa Stark some hope! Theon/Reek finally blurted out to her that he indeed lied about killing Bran and Rickon, and for all he knows they’re still out there somewhere, alive. So now Sansa knows that instead of having no family, she has at least 3 siblings still out there. With the end of the season looming, Sansa is nearing rescue from some of her friends still in the north. Whether that be by Stannis’ army, Brienne and Pod, Littlefinger, or a very farfetched alternative theory (I think you know the one, I’m not going to spoil it), that remains to be seen. All I know is that regardless of who comes to save her, the season ends with her burning every Bolton alive, after she fillets Ramsey. Time for Sansa to get some payback.

Unlikely alliance

Back in Meereen, we have an all-star team up! Jorah was kicked to the curb once again, like a puppy who can’t learn not to pee in the house. I don’t know his angle with going back to that guy, but honestly, I could care less about him. I’m more interested in Tyrion and Dany being drinking buddies! Their sarcastic banter back and forth to each other was just as great as I was hoping it would be. I see this as the start of an awesome friendship. During this bonding convo, Tyrion made a pretty good point to Dany: You already have support here, and absolutely zero in Westeros. Why bother. And although I see his point, there’s no way Dany is giving up on one day sitting on the Iron Throne. And we all want to see it anyway, so you keep pushing, girl!

Hey Cersei… U good?

Oh, how the bitchy have fallen. Cersei Lannister, Queen snark/bitch, got thrown into the dungeons last week by the High Sparrow and his fanatical cult. This week we checked in with her, only to find out that Tommen has locked himself in his quarters with Ser Pounce and will not come out for anyone, not even to see his wife or dear mommy. I can’t even believe people thought it was a good idea to give this kid the Iron Throne. As I say every week, GROW A PAIR, TOMMEN. Cersei’s only option seems to be confession, but come on, she’s Cersei, she’s not going to bow down to these people. Unless they threaten Tommen, which will probably happen very soon. I think her main problem right now, besides her very bad hair day, is that they aren’t even serving wine in the dungeons. That’s rough.


Everyone in Westeros loves to throw around the line “Winter is Coming,” but no one except Jon Snow actually seems to care what that means. They’re all chilling in their castles and their dungeons and fighting over a throne or the others’ “sins,” but HELLO, there’s an army of creepy snow zombies coming for you!!

I am so happy this slow, mostly boring season has been shattered by this epic battle scene. And as usual, Jon mothereffing Snow is smack in the middle of it. He’s such a badass (and sexy, if I may add). No one at Castle Black, especially young Olly, is happy with Jon letting the Wildlings crash there. Look Olly, I’m sorry your family got killed, but Winter is coming, OK?! Besides, you live in Westeros, it was bound to happen regardless. I’m very nervous that after narrowly escaping the white walkers, Jon is going to come back to Castle Black and all of those idiots (except Sam of course) will turn against him. Also, I think Sam’s definitely dying this season. I don’t know, just a hunch.

How about that Valyrian steel, huh? I know that Jon Snow is one of the “untouchable” characters in this show right now (that will probably change eventually), but I’m not going to lie, I was hella nervous when he was fighting that white walker. And then BOOM, Valyrian steel coming at you! He was even surprised. They better find a way to mass produce that shit, and fast.

Those white walkers are scary as hell man. Especially the Night’s King. That stare down between him and Jon at the end, with no music, gave me absolute chills. And Jon’s face the moment he rose up all those dead into white walkers literally read, “Why can’t I catch a break. Just once.”

So overall, a fantastic episode. Definitely the best of Season 5 so far. I can’t believe there’s only two left!


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